What have you read that helped you navigate death, dying and end-of-life?
We want to hear from you!
What book have you read that made an impact on you so much so that you are inspired to share it? What did you learn? How did you translate that into some form of action (internally or externally). Send us an EMAIL, we wanna hear more! So many awesome books out there to discover and share!
BOOKS
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Hope for the Best, Plan for the Rest
Book review offered by: Laura Cleminson, Death Doula, Hospice Volunteer and Founder of the Pre-Dead Social Club
[Real life stories] [Palliative Care] [Navigating Life-limiting illness] [Patient-advocacy]
Drs. Sammy Winemaker & Hsien Seow, a palliative care doctor and a medical researcher inspired by what they’ve had the opportunity to learn from thousands of seriously ill patients to reveal the seven keys for a better illness experiences.
This book is packed with real life stories and practical exercises for us to do to improve our illness journey right from diagnosis.
Sammy and Hsein are both compassionate and realistic. They see and work in a broken medical system so they understand how that impacts our illness journeys. They believe we can find hope in the face of uncertainty. They believe we can live well, be fully informed, and be activated—and feel more like a person and less like a patient.
They believe in the power of being activated and being able to advocate and in the ability for everyone involved to communicate better along the way. This book provides both tools and encouragement to do just that. -
"Final Gifts"
Book review offered by: Laura Cleminson, Death Doula, Hospice Volunteer and Founder of the Pre-Dead Social Club
[Real life stories] [Nearing Death Experiences] [Hospice] [Dying Process]
Maggie Callanan & Patricia Kelley, both hospices nurses, share intimate experiences of what happens at the bedside of a dying person, the place many of us have never been, but we have questions about.
These stories are not medical moments. They span a multitude of tender conversations to help demystify things we’ve heard or seen, but didn’t understand. There is comfort and wisdom in each chapter inviting greater understanding. No doubt you will find stories that resonate with you.
Chapter 3 was particularly of interest, as the authors dive into what people NEED for a peaceful death, the thing we all desire. -
"Being Mortal"
Book review offered by: Laura Cleminson, Death Doula, Hospice Volunteer and Founder of the Pre-Dead Social Club
[Real life stories] [Navigating modern medicine] [Navigating death from a doctor’s lens]
This was the first book I read related to death and dying. It was loaned to me by a friend who worked in palliative care, before I knew what that was, let alone spell it. I’ve read this book many times, gifted it even more.
It opened my eyes to how hard it is know what path a patient should choose, let alone the questions we need to ask that will support us in making informed decisions.
Atul Gawande introduced me to the concept of working our way up to the big question of “What values do you have and how can we meet those with your goals of care.” (Which IS a big question that IS hard to answer in one fell swoop all neat and tidy.) He starts by asking, “What is a good day for you?” Such a brilliant approach that we all can unpack and build upon.
I’m pretty sure this book will never grow old. -
"Navigating Life's Final Journey: Conversations, Choices, Resources"
Book review offered by: Laura Cleminson, Death Doula, Hospice Volunteer and Founder of the Pre-Dead Social Club
[Real life stories] [End-of-life choices][Hospice] [Palliative Care]
Pat O’Connor has a quiet and tender way of gently reminding us we are living longer and good health doesn't necessarily keep pace. Her empathy as Nurse Practitioner, board certified in adult, palliative and hospice medicine shines through each chapter. The stories are easily digestible. We’re introduced to individuals and families who traversed our complicated medical system, working with professionals hardwired to "save lives" for many diseases which there is no cure for.
So, how do we in the most tender of times know what we should do? How do we reclaim our agency on our last chapter in a manner reflective of our values and what is important to us when we are tired and feel our worst? Through hindsight and without being prescriptive, Pat offers up situations she believes many of us would appreciate avoiding.Within these 80+ pages are poignant stories to start conversations with friends, family members or anyone that is curious about end-of-life issues. After I read this book a couple times, I asked my 83 yr old dad if he'd be interested in reading and discussing it. He did and we did. I have no doubt some of these stories will be called upon again as compass settings to either avoid or navigate toward. They remind us that others have walked this path before and by sharing their stories and talking about them, we are getting stronger and clearer.
Dave & Annie’s Story on Page 18 offered profound insight I’ll carry with me forever.
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"Ordinary Medicine"
Book review offered by: Laura Cleminson, Death Doula, Hospice Volunteer and Founder of the Pre-Dead Social Club.
[Medical ethics] [Patient Decisions] [Treatment Decisions]You start poking around enough with a healthy curiosity of “how did we get here” as it pertains to our medical delivery system with so little education and training on death and dying and you’ll stumble onto people who are digging deep, doing the research and providing information for us to digest and reflect. Prompting us to reclaim our agency in the halls of modern medicine - if we chose.
Sharon Kaufman is someone I wish I had met. She is an esteemed medical anthropologist who died April 2, 2022. Without her research I would still be on loose footings when it comes to understanding our modern medicine journey thus far.
Toss the idea that this is gonna be a boring book, it’s riveting and asks us ALL where do we draw the line when it comes to extraordinary treatments and longer lives. Who benefits? -
Coping Courageously
Book reviewed by: Laura Cleminson
[Caregivers Guide] [For Physicians & Clinicians] [Palliative Care] [Life Limiting Illness] [Terminal Diagnosis] [Tools for family communication]Dr. Delia Chiaramonte is an Integrative Palliative Care doctor that believes in shining a light on both sides of the palliative care discussion, while encouraging patients and their families to create a care plans that support all involved, not just the patient. Widen the lens and address gaps practically, with the goal of not burning out the caregiver (if solo) or the team.
Her book is full of many real-life stories to draw from and to encourage us all to be kind to ourselves in the journey ahead when serious illnesses occur. -
The Death of You: A Book for Anyone Who Might Not Live Forever
Book reviewed by: Susan A., Bangor, ME, another human that will die someday.
[Navigating life and death] [Guided Exercises]
You know when you read a book that gets you so jazzed you want to tell everyone about it? I’m told, this IS that book. The recommendation was submitted by an individual who navigated a very significant death in her life and was someone who self-admittedly was afraid of death for most of her life. She threw herself into studying death in different cultures, read a plethora of books and listened to an equal amount of podcasts and THIS book is the one that stood out from the rest.“This book was the absolute pinnacle of my shift from fear to open acceptance. It made me confront death in a way that I hadn’t before and in a manner that made me feel not so alone. Miguel has a way of presenting things in a matter of fact, straightforward directness that is enveloped in compassion and kindness. This book didn’t just help me navigate death; it helped me discover it.” ~Susan from Bangor, ME
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